Category: z’Old Funny Crap

The New Maid


Tony dials his home number from work. A strange woman answers. ‘

Tony says, “Who is this?”

“This is the maid,” answered the woman.

“We don’t have a maid!”

“I was just hired this morning by the lady of the house.”

“Well, this is her husband. Is she there?”

“Ummm…she’s upstairs in the bedroom with someone who I just figured was her husband.”

Tony is fuming. He says to the maid, “Listen, would you like to make $50,000?”

“What do I have to do?”

“I want you to get my gun from my desk in the den and shoot that witch and the jerk she’s with.”

The maid puts down the phone. Tony hears footsteps, followed by a couple of gunshots.

The maid comes back to the phone. “What should I do with the bodies?”

“Throw them in the swimming pool!”

“What pool?”

“Uh….. Is this 832-4821?”