Andy Scott goes to visit his grandmother and he brings his Roy with him.
While he’s talking to his grandmother, Roy starts eating the peanuts on the coffee table, and finished them off.
As they’re leaving, Roy says to Andy’s grandmother, “Thanks for the peanuts.”
She says, “Yeah, since I lost my dentures I can only suck the chocolate off them.”
70-year-old Bill Thompson went for his annual physical. He told the doctor that he felt fine, but often had to go to the bathroom during the night. Then he said, “But you know Doc, I’m blessed. God knows my eyesight is going, so he puts on the light when I pee, and turns it off when I’m done!”
A little later in the day, Dr. Smith called Bill’s wife and said, “Your husband’s test results were fine, but he said something strange that has been bugging me. He claims that God turns the light on and off for him when uses the bathroom at night.”
Lois exclaimed, “That old fool! He’s been peeing in the refrigerator again!”
