Punk Zombie

Funny one liners

How many men does it take to open a beer?
None. It should be opened when she brings it.
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Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
Because a woman who can’t even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.
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Why do women have smaller feet than men?
It’s one of those “evolutionary things” that allows
Them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
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How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
When she starts a sentence with “A man once told me…”

Random Pic: Alligator Sign

Happy New Year!

Happy New Year!

Blonde and Deodorant

This blonde named Tara Lewis walks into a drugstore and asks the pharmacist for some bottom deodorant. The pharmacist, a little bemused, explains to her that they don’t sell anything called bottom deodorant, and never have. Unfazed, Tara assures him that she has been buying the stuff from this store on a regular basis, and would like some more. “I’m sorry,” says the pharmacist, “we don’t have any.”

“But I always get it here,” says Tara.

“Do you have the container it comes in?”

“Yes!” says Tara, “I will go and get it.”

She returns with the container and hands it to the pharmacist, who looks at it and says to her, “This is just a normal stick of underarm deodorant.”

Then Tara annoyed , snatches the container back and reads out loud from the container: “To apply, push up bottom.”

Eye Candy Video